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For years, the conventional wisdom for working mothers has been, "You can't have your cake and eat it too." In other words, you can be there for your children, or you can advance in your career, but not both.
Only Clark Kent has to be Superman, but every working mother has had to be Superwoman, says Ellen Bravo, director of 9to5, National Association of Working Women. To succeed both at home and at work, women need the right amount of support.
Fortunately, the prevailing winds are beginning to change, and women are finding they can balance work and family. Here are five tips to help you along the way.
Be a Valuable Team Member
Set standards for excellence, says Thia Hamilton, former deputy director of Women Work! The National Network for Women's Employment. Distinguish yourself as someone really special; always be looking ahead. Hamilton argues that once you've become valuable to your employer, it will be much easier to stand up for what you need. Just be sure you always frame it in terms of how your company might benefit from the proposal you're making.
Telecommuters: Get Recognition for the Work You Do
For working moms with a telecommuting arrangement, lack of face time may influence a manager's perception of how hard they're working. There's just something about the sight of people hunkered down at their desks that sends the "hard worker" message, even if what they're really doing is paying their bills or looking for good vacation spots.
Working mothers need to be creative to make sure they get credit for a job well done. Propose up front how you plan to keep in touch, and then stick to your plan, whether it's calling in frequently, sending regular emails, logging your hours or asking for quarterly reviews. And since you've asked for flexibility from your employer, it's only fair to be flexible in return. If some vital meeting arises on a morning you weren't supposed to be in the office, do your best to be there anyway.
Be Sure Your Employer Offers Time, Money and Resources
Some employers are going to be more sympathetic to your situation than others. According to Bravo, working mothers need three things: time to deal with family responsibilities, a decent wage and access to quality care-giving resources, such as an on-site day care program. "Employers who do this have a better bottom line, and the main reason for that is employee loyalty," says Bravo. "These policies cut down tremendously on turnover.
Do Some Research
If you've decided to ask your company for a policy change on flextime, find other people who feel the way you do, and then come up with a plan together. Before you make your pitch to the boss, plan a strategy. "Practice, rehearse and be prepared," Bravo says. "There's a lot of power in anticipating what you might be asked and in being prepared with answers.
Practice Patience
There's no doubt that with the ever-growing number of working mothers in the workforce, companies are taking another look at how business gets done. But women should also know that changes won't take place overnight. It will be even tougher for working mothers who don't have a well-established track record on the job before they start making demands. According to Hamilton, women just need to hang in there. As they begin to build references for themselves and as the workplace continues to evolve, working mothers will be better off than ever before.
In the meantime, your best strategy is to be a great employee. "If you are getting the job done and showing in every way that you're going the extra mile, if you're not just asking for breaks, leniency and special treatment but offering solutions, you're much likelier to get what you need," says Hamilton.
Additional Articles in This Feature
• Continue to Be Corporate or Stay at Home?
• Prepare Early for Maternity Leave
• Returning After a Leave
• Tips for Working Mothers
• Help Your Family Adapt to Your Home Business
• Just Say No
• Employers Working Mothers Will Love
